The Costs of Committing to the Kitchen

Ever since I was a young girl, I have always compared my father’s kitchen at our Italian restaurant to a war zone. Imagine pure, nine year old Yanna wandering into the kitchen on a busy day to see Dad, but rather walking straight into a pit of swear words and the loud banging of pots and pans. It was a scary sight to watch my father angrily scream orders to his cooks, waiters, and waitresses. I knew it was no place for me; even my mother in her mid-thirties felt uncomfortable in the harsh environment. On days that are less chaotic, I do have the opportunity to wander through the kitchen and chat with some of the employees. Something surprising that I have observed while exploring the kitchen is that in the whole 35 years that my father has been in the restaurant business, not once have I seen a female cooking behind the stove. The only exception is my relentless, 80 year old grandmother who refuses to retire because cooking is her whole life and passion. 

The clips that Mrs. Hamovit presented to us about Julia Child reminded me of my grandmother. They share a witty sense of humor, strength, and toughness. Julia Child once said,“I think every woman should have a blowtorch.” Although I wouldn’t trust myself too much with a blowtorch in hand, I have no doubt that my grandmother would hold it up proudly without any hesitation. Even if she gets a nasty burn or a painful cut in the kitchen, she quickly bandages it up and keeps on pushing for another 8 hours until the day of work is done. That being said, I believe that women like Julia Child and my grandmother transcend the stereotypical view that women are too soft and weak to handle the harshness of the kitchen and the “manly” tools a chef must wield. The kitchen in a restaurant can be a daunting environment and it is certainly possible that male chefs or men in positions of authority in the restaurant business may discriminate against female employees. In the article “Women Chefs Still Walk ‘A Fine Line’ In the Kitchen,” chef Barbara Lynch remarks, “First of all, wherever you choose to work, you need to be treated with dignity.” She reminds the audience that respect is imperative in the workplace and that discimination or inappropriate behavior should not be tolerated; however, it is up to you to prove yourself worthy and fight your way up the hierarchy to earn even more acclaim in the kitchen. This is a challenge, but women like Cat Cora and Barbara Lynch have proven that becoming renowned is a tangible goal with hard work and perseverance. 

 It most certainly can be challenging for a woman to balance family life and working as a chef, but logically wouldn’t a husband or a father be giving up the equivalent with regard to family time and household responsibilities? In the past, women were often held responsible for managing and maintaining the household, cooking meals for the family, and nurturing children; however, this is shifting in modern day society. In my family, my mother does the majority of the cooking, but I would attribute that to my father growing sick of prepping meals because it is what he does for a living. The articles focus on how women may struggle with balancing family and their job, but many men also must learn to cope with these difficulties and manage a healthy balance as well. My father has had to make countless sacrifices throughout his life to provide for our family. He spent several hours in the kitchen when I was a young girl, missed dance recitals and soccer games, and even worked past midnight on some occasions. By no means did my father want to miss out on things in my childhood. He worked hard in the kitchen so that he could support my brothers and I in the future and provide us with the education that he did not have access to. It is often a matter of whether or not you are willing to give up the time to commit to being a chef and put your mind to working those long hours.